Soul
by The Zazu
Summary: Eclectic mixes of screaming guitars, rumbling drums, and wailing lyrics... all meshed to formulate a broken melody. Strained, beautifully harsh vocals chorused achingly in unison, rising and falling to new tempos. Two perspectives. [Digimon Adventure]
1. Soul

**Title**: Soul by The Zazu

**Rated**: **PG**

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Digimon Adventure.

**Author's Note**: I have never written about this character and I haven't seen any fiction about him lately. You know, I hate it when certain characters get ignored because they aren't as popular as others. :( Saddening, really. Anyway, as I always say, read on and **enjoy**.

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**Chapter One: Soul**

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"I wish they would only take me as I am."

-- _Vincent Van Gogh_

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Legato.

A soft, soulful sound caressed the air, lilting with the soft breeze trickling in through the wide bay windows. The tone was melancholy, but at the same time sweet and simple. The tune swirled in intricate patterns, letting the smooth sound only produced by strings fill the air. A hand moved up and down, moving the bow gently across the violin's taut strings. The sound had to be perfect. Another hand delicately touched upon the violin, adding to the harmonious melody.

Crescendo.

The strings vibrated gently, as the slender bow moved across the strings with extreme expertise. The pale, white hand began to move faster, creating the very image of tension and anger. Slim fingers darted across the instrument, once again deepening the enraged aura. Such a melody was so sorrowful and infuriated it was beautiful, yet painful to the ears. It expressed was within. A pair of jet-black eyes directed their gaze on the work at hand, gleaming with a joyful light. Music was this artist's passion.

Decrescendo.

The tune softened from its angered state, falling back to its quiet, saddened stage. The man calmly continued to play, a tiny smile curving at his rosy lips. The mourn that had welled up inside him over years only could be expressed as music, for words could not express the hurt and shame he felt.

Fine.

The lovely sound ended abruptly, the continuity of the music ruined. The man set the violin on his lap cautiously and guided his wheelchair to the vast windows in front of him. There he was, in a beautiful mansion, in a cream-colored living room with a magnificent grand piano looking out on awesome country greenery.

The richness of his surroundings could not cure him. Not ever.

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_"Terra Force!" The cry of Wargreymon resounded. The magnificent mega evolution of Agumon let go of the huge ball of fire in his hands, letting the attack hit the formidable figure of Daemon. Daemon merely chuckled softly, easily flitting away from the attack, his maroon robes swirling behind him. It was seven years after the destruction of Malomyotismon (Belial Vamdemon) and the rather freakish appearance of Daemon. The Digidestined, now around their twenties, had to once again put Daemon in his place._

_And everything was going downhill._

_It seemed as if Daemon could evade every single attack directed to him. It was absolutely inhuman. Yagami Taichi watched his team of digidestined fight in horror. They weren't getting anywhere. They needed more strength – perhaps from Gennai. Taichi rubbed his temples already feeling his hair turn gray. Life was not good. "C'mon guys," he cried out hoarsely. A small sound of despair entered his voice. 'God, we're going to lose.. for the first time...' he thought despondently_

_23-year-old Kido Jyou turned to face his companion with a reassuring grin on his face. For once it appeared that 'fraidy-cat' Jyou had lost all his cowardice. "Uh, Taichi, don't give up?" he suggested in his own feeble manner, continuing to keep a smile on his face. "I have it under control." The pair knew that it was a lie, but it was better than nothing. In a split second Taichi fell to his knees pointing towards fray with eyes full of unnatural terror._

_"Jyou... watch... out."_

_A flash of bright light, then darkness._

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Jyou closed his eyes slowly, attempting to push away the memory that led him to the life he had now. Somehow, he had been rushed to a hospital. He sighed softly. _Oh yeah, that worked all right. _Jyou opened his eyes and stared down at his violin, cradling it softly. His long strands of blue hair fell into his eyes, obscuring the tears forming.

Jyou couldn't walk anymore.

The 30-year-old had been paralyzed from waist down, making his life difficult. What made it even more difficult and shameful was the fact that the leader of the Digidestined, Yagami Taichi had put the blame on himself. Jyou trembled softly. It hurt seeing this strong man in such a way... Taichi always was the strongest, for everybody. Just as Jyou had always been the weakest. _That's the only reason he blamed himself... Everyone knew I was the invalid Digidestined... I tried not to be. I tried so **hard**_.

Jyou continued to stare silently at his precious violin. Afterwards, everyone had treated him with utmost sympathy and acted as if he was a fragile, porcelain doll always at the risk of being broken. His father always looked at him with disappointment shining in his eyes; something he could not bear. Mr. Kido always wished that his son would become a doctor... but who had heard of a paralyzed doctor? Jyou felt as if he had shattered the dreams of the ones around him. Slowly, the young man fell into a mute withdrawal and became an empty shell. Now people also believed he was mentally retarded.

A chill tear slipped down his cheek.

This is why he had come here, to the countryside, far away from the ones he had hurt and the ones that had hurt him.

The man lifted the violin to his chin once more, letting the tears fall freely. Dark eyes stared into the distance.

"I'm finding my soul..."

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**Author's Note**: It was an okay story. I love the beginning. Love, hate – share it all with me. _Reviews would be lovely_.


	2. Soulless

**Title**: Soul by The Zazu

**Rating**: PG

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Digimon.

**Author's Note**: This revolves around Taichi. Hopefully the style I used in Soul has somewhat carried into this fic. Anyway, **enjoy**.

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**Chapter Two: Soulless **

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"I feel so guilty  
My words are empty  
No signs to give you  
don't have the time for you

I put a shield upon you  
I didn't mean to hurt you  
would've only poisoned your mind  
Never meant to make you cry

I never thought that the time and the distance  
Between us made you so much colder  
I'll carry the world on my shoulders..."

– '_Guilty' by The Rasmus_

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Forte.

That's how the music started.

Eclectic mixes of screaming guitars, rumbling drums, and wailing lyrics... all meshed to formulate a broken melody. A broken melody that boldly preached the pain and suffering of the world to any faithful followers that would listen. Strained, beautifully harsh vocals chorused achingly in unison, rising and falling to new tempos.

A broken melody is still a melody however.

Fortissimo.

The volume of the rock music grew in power. A curled up figure continued to press headphones to ears already resounding with the loud melody. The cords of the headphones slowly grew into the battered shape of a CD player. It was a reliable CD player; always dishing out tunes that could satiate any thirst or drown any unwanted emotions. It always expressed what Yagami Taichi couldn't himself express in his own words.

"Guilty, woh oh oh oh, I feel so, empty... yeah, you know how to make me feel," the 29-year-old whispered gently, staring blankly at the wall before him. It was funny how old wounds could suddenly reopen, bringing back unwanted memories. Soft brown hair – only chin-length now – was spiked in all directions and somehow failed to shield a pair of painfully sorrowful chocolate eyes. Taichi was an ambassador now... far from his dream of being a soccer star. These days, everyone had given up their dreams.

Yes, it had been seven long years.

Taichi shut his eyes, curling up into an even tighter ball. He hated his resurfacing memories. And he hated resorting back to his childish ways of washing away sorrow when he was clearly an adult.

But some things are inevitable.

"I don't want to be a leader. I didn't want to be leader. Why was I the one who had to be courageous all the time? Oh yeah, I'm the Destined of Courage," Taichi muttered into the air, his words laced thickly with scorn and pain. "I don't see why I had to be such a good guy... I felt guilty at every death I witnessed of an innocent digimon. Hey, maybe they _deserved_ it." Suddenly words that his friends never would have expected him to say left his mouth. "I witnessed too many things; all horrible. I saw someone get severely hurt... and I couldn't stop anything. I took the blame, of course. I guess _Jyou_ didn't want that. He also didn't understand my **_guilt_**."

Then Yagami Taichi fell silent.

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_'We're gonna lose, we're gonna lose, oh my dear god, why are we losing? We're not supposed to lose, we're not supposed to lose, please, please, Wargreymon, do something!' A continuous stream of thoughts rushed through the mind of 22-year-old Yagami Taichi as he attempted to keep his legs from giving away. Everything had been so abrupt. Out of nowhere, Daemon had once again materialized, providing a challenge for the now older DigiDestined. Perhaps there were other younger Destined children out there... but only this team understood the extent of this power. The younger group had gone off to the other side of town, controlling Daemon's more powerful minions. And how Taichi wished for their help right now. Maybe if they worked together, they could put this guy away._

_At the moment, it was only Agumon fighting – in his mega form of course. MetalGarurumon had taken his turn the day before in the fighting and was completely weary, as were the rest of the digimon. "C'mon guys," he whispered achingly, watching Daemon deflect Wargreymon's Terra Force with ease. 'There's no hope. There's no hope.'_

_A shaky, yet kind voice intruded into the man's thoughts. "Uh, Taichi, don't give up?" The blue-haired figure of 'fraidy-cat' Kido Jyou peered cheerily at him. Taichi was surprised, seeing so Jyou so courageous. He really was reliable, and definitely a good guy. Taichi's abruptly widened as he spotted Daemon's fresh attack swerve in the direction of Jyou. 'God, no.' _

_"Jyou... watch... out!"_

_But Jyou was down._

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"God, no."

Taichi's rubbed his eyes, brushing away stray tears at the thought. He should have seen the attack sooner, right? 'Why are these memories resurfacing?' he thought angrily.

"No."

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_He looked so fragile in that sterile room, on that plain, white bed. Taichi was alone in the room, fixated on the prone, lanky figure outstretched on the bed. The man averted his gaze for a moment, unable to look at his friend any longer. The doctors said Jyou was paralyzed waist down. Daemon's attack had come to quickly and sent Jyou hurdling through the air with an inhuman scream leaving his lips. And all Taichi could do is scream with his friend, praying for a miracle to pluck Jyou away from the doomed situation. _

_Nothing happened. Jyou crashed._

_Taichi couldn't get rid of the image. He didn't know how Daemon was defeated, or if they even defeated the beast... He just knew that it was his fault._

_All his fault._

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"I feel so guilty... oh so guilty..." the words were uttered into the air once more. Taichi opened his eyes to stare at the wall once more. Soon after he had left the hospital, Jyou awakened to the horrific results of the accident. Everyone showered their love on him and Taichi blamed himself for the incident. But then one day Kido Jyou was gone, and his parents would not tell the DigiDestined where he went. It was as if Jyou had disappeared off from Earth totally.

If only Taichi could do the same... Even after seven years, the man had continued to shoulder the blame. Taichi hit the 'stop' button and suddenly got up, leaving the CD player on the ground. Getting off the couch, he grabbed his jacket and slipped out through the door, grimly. He didn't want to care anymore, but he needed to find Jyou.

Jyou was looking for his soul. Taichi wanted someone to take his guilty soul away.

"Make me soulless."

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**Author's Note**: Abrupt ending, yeah, I'll admit that. Love? Hate? _Reviews_ are always lovely. ;)


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